Episode 2 - The Better Half
Cast: Jairo Madrid
Synopsis: A man contemplates making the ultimate life changing decision...
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"You know how when you grab a woman's breast... it feels like... a bag of sand."
"Go home, prince. Drink some wine, make love to your wife. Tomorrow, we'll have our war."
"That's why no one will remember your name."
"Ray, when someone asks you if you're a god, you say YES! "
"You have your swords. I have my tricks. We play with the toys the gods give us."
"What are the chances of a guy like you and a girl like me ending up together? "
"What's your favorite scary movie? "
"We all go a little mad sometimes. "
"Why so serious? "
"You sack of wine! Before my time is done, I will look down on your corpse and smile. "
"Stop! Too many men have died today. If killing is your only talent, that's your curse. I don't want anyone dying for me. "
"Are you a mexi-CAN or a mexi-CAN'T? "
"Welcome to prime time bitch!"
"I have endured what no one on earth has endured before. I kissed the hands of the man who killed my son. "
"We're gonna have so many babies! "
"I AM NOT GOING TO BURY MY SON! MY SON IS GOING TO BURY ME! "
"My son is dying, and I'm broke. If I don't qualify for Medicare, WHO THE HELL DOES? "
"To protect the sheep you gotta catch the wolf, and it takes a wolf to catch a wolf. "
"King Kong ain't got **** on me! "
"Hi I'm Chucky, wanna play? "
"I've seen enough horror movies to know that any guy wearing a mask is not good. "
"A big man is ripping your ears off Percy. I'd do as he says "
"I couldn't help it, boss. I tried to take it back, but it was too late. "
"I just can't see God putting a gift like that in the hands of a man who would kill a child. "
"People hurt the ones they love. THat's how it is all around the world. "
"I got mind control over Deebo. He be like Shut the **** up. I be quiet. But when he leave, I be talking again. "
"It's Friday; you ain't got no job... and you ain't got **** to do! "
"There are certain rules that one must abide by in order to successfully survive a horror movie... "
"You bought me a gun rack, I don't own a gun let alone many guns to necessitate a gun rack. "
"I was elected to lead, not to read. "
"It's party time, P-A-R-T-why? Because I gotta! "
"Oh don't worry. Whales don't eat clownfish. They eat krill. Oh look, krill. "
"It's Halloween, everyone's entitled to one good scare. "
"If you're a bird, I'm a bird. "
"I want to play a game. "
"That's my sweetheart in there, wherever she is, that's where my home is. "
"No, if we died we would have heard, We are crashing, we we are crashing.! "
"I never miss. "
"They're coming to get you Barbara. "
"When there's no more room in hell, the dead will walk the earth. "
"No brain, no pain...think about it. "
"So you're telling me there's a chance....YES! "
"If I'm not back in five minutes... just wait longer. "
"So, what are you trying to say? "
"I can be your best friend or your worst enemy. You seem to prefer the latter. "
"Won't you please be my prisoner, please please please! "
"All's fair in love and basketball, right? "
"I've loved you since I was 11, the **** just won't go away. "
"Can't you people see there are guns here? "
"I have to return some videotapes. "
"My son WORKS!? "
"Why won't you die? "
"For-e-ver! "
"This is no democracy. It is a dictatorship. I am the law. "